Understanding Meditation Through Attentiveness
If you're just starting off to learn meditation, either in a guided meditation group or by yourself, you sit for five or ten minutes each session; try to sit each day at the same time, morning or evening, whichever suits you right. You let the daily five to ten minutes to expand to fifteen or twenty minutes when the weeks follow, but you never try and force the pace.
Meditation isn't about gritting the teeth in determination. It's about sitting quietly with yourself, and while it involves its own kind of discipline this has nothing to do with force than with yielding and letting go.
When the inevitable thoughts or emotions arise, you allow them to pass in and out of consciousness like clouds reflected in water. You don't try to push them out, but leave them to move of their own accord. No matter how 'important' the thoughts seem to be or how pressing or demanding the sentiments, you don't hang on to them or let one thought or emotion to start another and another until you are off on a wool-gathering trail that takes you further and further from the simple point of the breathe in and breathe out.
If, nevertheless, you do lose control, gently but definitely return to your breathing the moment you realize this has happened. Avoid being impatient with yourself or convincing yourself you'll never pick up how to meditate. Your deviating mind is simply demonstrating to you just how much you have to train your meditation techniques. It is helping you, prompting you, showing you how little control you have over your own thinking. The right response is gratitude, gratitude towards that part of your mind that has become aware you are wool-gathering and that has prompted you to return to your point of focus.
I cannot overstate how important this attitude of gratitude is. If you curse yourself each time you become aware you are disoriented in thought, you will not only be awakening the unwelcome emotion of self-disgust, you will be conditioning your mind not to remind you when it is wandering in the future. You are in effect punishing it each time for reminding you, and naturally it doesn't like being punished. So it will remind you less and less often, and you will find attention becomes harder and harder. In response to the dissatisfaction that this brings, your mind will then start whispering persuasively to you that meditation is a total waste of time, and that you would be well suggested to find something better to do with your time.
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